Wednesday, August 31, 2011

What a day :)

Just a couple of things that made today GREAT!

* Getting a killer parking spot at 8am
* Bingo in music theory
* Winning bingo in music theory
              (do you know how often I win bingo? It was a happy moment)
* My first voice lesson with Marbox!
              (she already has me singing like I never have before)
* Not having to turn in my Propanda Packet in English.
* Nailing my first speech in my communications class.
* Institute Folk Dance Team!!!!!
* Being offered a position as Secretary for the Folk Dance Team
* My insane headache magically disappearing
* Finding my presentational song in Acting for Musical Theatre
* Being offered a role in Sleepy Hollow at Centerpoint!!!
             (I'm finally in a show again. Huzzah!)
* The AAT Meeting and interviewing awesome freshman
* Eating lunch in the union with The Yin to My Yang, Connor Padilla
* Text messages from my best friends Elise Vander Does and Brittany Hathaway!
* Finding out my Holly Baby is finished! I can drive my car again soon :)
* Getting a call from one of my awesome friends, Sterling Walker!
* My own deck of Werewolf game cards.
            (Let's just say I'm stoked.)
* Red velvet cupcake from Vintage Cupcake from my roommate Callie
            (With a big glass of milk, of course!)
* First rehearsal and read-through for Sleepy Hollow
* Hearing about a friend receiving her mission call!
            (Manchester England. I know, I'm jealous too.)
* Receiving a huge compliment from someone I really look up to.
            (It really meant so much to me to hear it.)
* Talking to Mom on the phone.
* Big glass of chocolate milk before bed. Yum.


It really has been an awesome day. Didn't start that way... I woke up at 4am in the morning with an insane headache and hardly got any sleep. I also had several classes and assignments I wasn't looking forward to. But everything turned around! Things were just going my way today, left and right! I am so blessed :)

My life is going to be crazy busy this semester!
But some awesome things are happening. I love it.
And to think, Wednesday is over! The long weekend is on its way! :)

Monday, August 29, 2011

O-Town, Chapter Two.

Hello fellow blog-readers!
With an amazing summer behind me, a wonderful trip to Colorado completed, and the first week of school already over, it's time to buckle down for classes and brace myself for the year. Another semester at Weber State University is staring me in the face.

Now that I've readjusted to the crazy insane life of a college student, I'm realizing how excited I am for this semester. I have a lot of goals, plans, and adventures laid out before me... and I can't wait to learn and discover new things and make new friends.

Just one short (but seemingly forever long) week ago, I was having the hardest time leaving home, summer, and friends behind me and moving back out to Ogden. But now that I'm here and class has started; I realize that I had forgotten how much I LOVE being up here for school. Granted, there are some things and people that I will miss in Riverton... but Ogden is where I am supposed to be right now. I know that, I embrace it, and I am SO excited for this year.

I love learning. I love living on my own and being an adult. I love college. I guess I just forgot how much I love it. Well, my friends, I love it a lot! I'm so happy to be here.

And so far, the semester looks promising. Here's the break-down of my fall semester classes:

Music Theory: Maurie Tarbox is SUCH a FUN teacher. I usually hate theory classes. Maurie has a huge keyboard that she hangs up on the wall and we get to sing, play music on the wall, pound garbage cans with sticks, and participate in many other childish-but-oh-so-great activities! I love it! There are also some great people in this class like Shelby Andersen and Addison Welch, among others (they're just my seat-neighbors). It's weird being in a class with the big kids. ;) but I love it!

English 2010: I love English. I love reading and writing. Grammar and spelling have always come so much easier to me than numbers and formulas. This class is probably going to be one of my hardest, seeing as we focus on writing. I'm preparing myself for a lot of essays and the like... but I'm excited! Not to mention there's a really cute chem. major in the class. Just a perk. Oh, and our teacher taught English in Palestine... how cool is that?!

Communications 1020: Looks like a cake-walk. We have to give five public speeches in front of the class, so it doesn't look too hard. Hopefully I won't be nervous when I have to give my speeches. First one is this Wednesday, so we'll see how it goes. The teacher seems nice, there are a couple nice people in the class... should be good. Gotta love those general eds!

Acting for Musical Theatre: I am so scared/ecstatic/nervous/excited/many other things for this class. We have to sing in front of the class. A lot. Singing in front of my peers (especially ones who know music) really freaks me out sometimes. I really need this class... I think it will help me with my confidence in singing. There are a lot of fun (not to mention talented) people in this class. And Jim Christian is teaching. Don't worry, he only forgot who I was on my first day back... let's hope it was just the hair color change. ;) But no matter, this class is going to be outstanding!

Acting 2: I'm back in another one of Tracy Callahan's classes, ready to expand on my acting skills. I'm pretty stoked for this class. Tracy knows how to get me pumped up for theatre, and I always learn so much in her classes. There are so many awesome people in the class with me, and we're already preparing monologues to perform for the class! Pretty awesome :)

Jazz 1: I get to be in a dance class! I get to be in a dance class!!! I LOVE dancing! Some of the steps are a little rudimentary, but it feels so awesome to be working out, sweating, and feeling sore muscles again! Ah! I've yet to meet the real teacher (we had a substitute all last week) but I have a bunch of friends from theatre in the class with me, and I just can't wait!

Private Vocal Lessons: I snagged lessons with Maurie Tarbox this year, and I couldn't be happier. I have heard SO many outstanding comments about this lady. I can already tell from my music theory class that she is very knowledgeable and talented. I cannot wait to improve my voice and learn from her in my lessons.

Some other things...

AAT: Somehow I became the Treasurer on the board this year. I know that every math teacher in high school will give you the, 'you will always use math for the rest of your life' lecture... but I am noticing this to be more and more true every day. I cannot escape it. This is a major bummer. But I figure that having experience as a Treasurer on my resume can be nothing but a fantastic thing, and I get to be on the board. I love being on the AAT board. I can't wait for another great season with the organization!

Institute Goodness: I'm going to enroll in an institute class this week (I know, I know, I've been slacking. Trips to Colorado are life-consuming!) and I'm also trying out for the WSU Institute Folk Dance Team this week. Spending time with the other students auditioning for the team has been such an incredible experience. I can tell that the people who are on the team become really close friends. Just in the week of auditions we have spent time together and I've met some really awesome people. I am CROSSING FINGERS that I make the team. I really need that balance in my life. I want to have some friends who are as nerdy as I am. :) But I know if I don't make the team, I have something different in store for me that will be just as fulfilling. So... to be continued!

Anyway... life is crazy, but I'm lovin' it so far. I'm so excited to be in school (ask me that in three months though... my answer may be different!) My classes are great, the people are great, my ward is great, my house is great (pictures to be posted soon) and life is just really, well, great!

Here is my list of goals for the fall semester:
No homework on Sundays.
Attend the temple twice a month.
Lose 5-8 pounds.
Be in bed by 11:00pm on weeknights
Write in my journal once a week
Read the Book of Mormon
Memorize my Patriarchal Blessing
... and more to come.

* It's also my goal to become more flexible by the end of the this school year. I want to have both my right and left splits down. I'm not looking forward to this, but I've been wanting to work on my flexibility for some time now.

So there we have it! Another year in the life of a college student. I'm excited to see where my classes and goals take me. Last year, my time at Weber State was amazing. I'm determined to make this year even better.

O-Town, Chapter Two. Here we come.

My best friend.


I am extremely glad to call Elise Vander Does my best friend. I never had a best friend growing up. Sometimes I was sad when I heard other people talk about their best friend. I wanted someone to tell secrets to, do crazy things with, and share memories with! But now I have a best friend! Not everyone is blessed with friends as wonderful as mine, and I don't know how I got so dang lucky. I met Elise at school. Last semester, Elise just text me one random evening because she had nothing to do. I didn't know her very well back then, but it turns out we both needed a friend and things kinda just clicked from day one.

Who knew that such a great friendship would blossom from that one text message?

The two of us have had many crazy adventures. She's always there for me to talk to, cry with, or laugh with. Unfortunately though, Elise lives in Colorado. When the semester ended she moved back home and I didn't get to see her all summer. We had several skype dates, a couple phone calls and text messages... but it just wasn't the same. So last Thursday I flew out to Denver to see her!

Elise is going on a mission, and so I initially flew out for her missionary farewell; although we spent the whole weekend together and did many crazy things! Here are some of the highlights.

Thursday
*I was so excited to meet Elise at the baggage claim, and we caught up on life all the way home... it was much-needed. Then we took some pictures at the park. Elise and I get camera-happy when we're together! So great!
*We ate dinner on the back porch and I saw a bunny! {side note: Parker, Colorado is infested with wild bunnies. I think it's hilarious. The Vander Does family hates them. They also have TEENY red spiders. Anyway.}
* Elise gave me a pascal! He is SO cute. I adore him, and now he sits upon my nightstand in all of his green, bug-eyed glory. It was so thoughtful of her to get me one... now we both have pascals! Thanks Elise!
*We went on a trip to target with Elise's dad, Jerry, where we bought a bag of german-chocolate marshmallows, two tubs of ice cream, and two packages of cookies! Then we watched Midway to Heaven while eating our goodies.


Friday
*The Vander Does family wakes up early. Earlier than me. haha. Elise and I watched Rookie Blue on Hulu while her mom, Shaunna, made a delicious breakfast! Stuffed french toast. You take two pieces of french toast and put strawberry jam and cream cheese in the middle when you grill it. Sprinkle some powdered sugar on top, with a glass of milk on the side = breakfast perfection.
*Elise took me to see this HUGE amphitheater in Colorado called "Red Rocks" It was gorgeous! And of course, more pictures were taken.
*We went to see the Denver Temple. I was hoping to do baptisms, but the temple was closed during my stay in Colorado. We walked to the gate and took a couple pictures though.
*Elise showed me one of her favorite places. Yogurt Land. Pretty sure I fell in love... and I discovered they have one in Utah! It's kind of like Frogurt. I love Frogurt, but I love Yogurt Land even more. They have cute spoons. And Pistachio flavored frozen yogurt. So. Delicious.
*We also went to the mall. I was admiring Elise's shirt, so I bought one just like it. Then I bought some sweet sunglasses. We tried on some crazy outfits, too. Then we bough friendship bracelets. Precious :)
*Jerry is the music teacher at Chaparral High School, Elise's Alma Mater. We went and watched one of 'Mr. V's' rehearsals. I got some great song ideas for my repertoire, and it was fun watching his students perform!
*Grandma Beasely flew in that afternoon. I met Grandma when Elise and I visited her in Logan last spring. She is wonderful. I also met Elise's oldest brother, Ryan. Elise's entire family is so wonderful!
*Dinner outside in the backyard again. Love it. (Aside from the hornet attacking our watermelon) We had BBQ sandwiches, potato salad, and fresh fruit. Yum.
*The whole family watched a really funny movie, the title of which I cannot remember. Something about big business? Not sure. Most of us fell asleep, but the part I saw was really funny :)


 Saturday
*We ate German pancakes for breakfast. They were so delicious! Elise's other brother, Brock, made them.
*The family and I all helped out with the cake. I even made my own little contribution... rolling tiny pieces of fondant into balls. Yeah... Elise and I had too many jokes over that one.
*Elise and I went to this pretty place called Meridean to take cute pictures. They are adorable! Later that night, Elise surprised me by putting together a collage of our pictures and framing it for me. It too, is sitting in my room. I love it SO much. :)
*Jerry and Shaunna spent the majority of the day preparing for Elise's farewell party/open house that was planned for later that night. Not only did they make the amazing three-tiered cake, they also made lemon pie, lime pie, strawberry cheesecake, rasberry cheesecake, pumpkin cheesecake, and cream puffs! The Vander Does family knows how to dine well! They're all great cooks.
*Elise and I made a music video. Just watch it. So silly. Thanks to Tyler Chancellor for being a good sport. ;)
*Little Caesar's for dinner right before the open house.
*Elise's open house was awesome! There are so many people who love her and she will make a great missionary. I had fun meeting her friends Kaitlyn and Scurti, as well as mingling with some of the adults. Some people thought I was Elise's age, or even that I was a returned missionary! ha! Got a kick out of that.

 

Sunday
*Got up early for church. 8:30 am. Elise did a BEAUTIFUL job with her farewell talk on service. She also sang two musical numbers; one with Tyler, and one with Brock. I cried a tiny bit. The meeting was definitely a success.
*Went home and invited some ward members/friends over for leftover desserts. I got to talk more with Scurti and Brock and Brock's fiancee Ashley. We had a good time.
*Elise and I finished editing our music video! We are so proud.
*Chatted with the family, enjoyed relaxing a little.
*Ate shrimp/chicken curry (or something to that effect). First time eating shrimp. And curry. It was different, but not bad! I just have to say again... the Vander Does family are great cooks! Everything I ate while I was there was SO divine. Holy cow.
*Drove to the airport, and said our goodbyes.


It was such an incredible trip! Elise and I are hoping to see each other one last time next weekend before she heads off to the MTC. Then we're planning on being pen pals while she's on her mission in Vegas.

While I was gone I missed auditions for both of the fall productions at school... Xanadu and Romeo and Juliet. People in the department have asked me if I'm disappointed that I wasn't cast because I missed most of the auditions. But here's my perspective: musicals and plays only last a couple of months... friendships last a lifetime. I would have LOVED to be in a show this fall. I am a performance major, after all. But I would never trade anything for my trip to Colorado to see Elise. While I was sitting in church listening to her talk, I knew it was where I was supposed to be last weekend.

Gosh, I'm going to miss that girl while she's gone! But I know she is going to be just as amazing of a missionary as she is a best friend... which is pretty darn amazing!!!

Really though. Elise is such an incredible friend and example to me. I know she will touch the lives of those she meets during the next year and a half. I will miss her, but I'm proud of her and all the great things she's doing! I couldn't ask for a better friend, and I hope that we will continue to be friends for the rest of our lives. Thanks to Mom and Dad for paying for my trip, and thanks to Elise's family for letting me stay, eat their food, use their house, and take up time with their daughter.

But the biggest thanks goes out to my best friend! Thanks Elise, for everything you do! You are going to be a phenomenal missionary! Thanks for your friendship and example. I love you!

Sunday, August 21, 2011

The Group.

They call themselves The Group. 

"Hey, is The Group doing anything tonight?"
"Mom, after church I'm hanging out with The Group."
"Come on over with The Group and watch a movie!"

The Group consists of some of the most amazing people I have ever met in my entire life. Never before have I had a collection of friends quite like these ones. I love each one of them and their distinct personalities, quirks, and eccentricities. These people have touched my life for good.

I was lucky enough to meet and be welcomed into The Group during my summer in Riverton. I met them in the singles ward, and from then on-- the rest was history.

I could write a novel about The Group, and still, the words would not adequately express how much they mean to me, everything they taught me, or how much I love em'! So instead, I'm giving a shout-out to as many people from The Group as I can!

Here we go. In no order of importance. Alphabetical by last and then first name :)

Stephani Burger:
This girl is one of the most philosophical, observant, profound people I know; and I love her for that. She is always full of great insight and awesome stories. I will never forget her analogy about the red sand and the green sand (That's a retelling for another time). She loves her friends and cares about them deeply. I admire her for her beauty and individuality. She is so easy to talk to and I'm so glad that we were able to bond more as the summer progressed. She listened to all of my girly talk when no one else was around to listen. I know I could trust her and ask her for advice. She is such an amazing person and I am so glad I have the privilege to call her my friend! Love you hun.

Sam Cook:
Sam and I kinda just clicked from day one.  We instantly became friends during one of my first games of Werewolf with The Group. If I need to laugh, Sam is the person I go to. His laugh is SO contagious... and whenever he laughs I find myself laughing too :) Sam has such a great testimony and I love hearing it and seeing it through his example. Sam is humble, super genuine, honest, laid-back, funny, and talented. He's an amazing songwriter! Sam is a real friend. I always know he's being himself and our friendship is real, if that makes any sense. I am so glad that we can just be ourselves and enjoy eachother's company. Sam is probably one of my closest friends in the group, and we always have a good time when we hang out. I think we perceive The Group in a similar light... and so I can talk to him about almost anything. We decided we're going to become pen pals while I'm in Ogden... which I think is pretty dang awesome! :) You're the best Sam!

Kyle Day:
When Kyle knew "The Pirates of Penzance" I could tell we would become friends. He's super tall, super smart, and is a super pianist! I just about cried when he played his arrangement of "Come Come Ye Saints." Kyle throws some of the best shin-digs at his house... complete with games, billiards, movies, food, and much more. He is always so willing to help out with anything, and I really look up to his enthusiasm to help other people. He didn't even hesitate to help me set up for Home Evening in my backyard. He's such a great guy, and I appreciated being able to talk to him last night before I left. I was reminded of just how awesome he is. Thanks for always letting us come over and party Kyle! :)

MariAnn Gebs:
What a sweetheart, this one is.  I didn't start getting to know her until the tail-end of the summer, but MariAnn has such a soft, kind, sweet spirit about her. She's really good at Werewolf whenever we play. I never know if I should pin her as the wolf or not ;) haha! Even though I still have a lot to learn about MariAnn, I always love having her with us. She just brings a light into the room and has the prettiest smile. :)

Devin Hansen:
Devin is such a cool guy! I remember meeting him towards the beginning of the summer, and then we got to be on the Home Evening committee together! Devin is such a hard worker and is so outgoing and welcoming to anyone that he meets. He's always ready to help me out and he doesn't wait around to be asked! It's been a blast serving on the H.E. committee with him, and we've had a fun time hanging out with the group too!
 
Hillary Higgins:
I didn't get to spend a ton of time with Hilary, but the few times I did talk with her she was SO sweet, friendly, and welcoming. I remember when she got after me for not texting her back one time... and I realized I had just gotten to know a really fantastic girl :) Over the summer I had the chance to see her finish a triathlon sprint... I have so much respect for her to do that, because I'm pretty sure I never could! We went to her house and watched the fireworks while eating popsicles over the 24th of July weekend... I will always remember that night, it was so much fun! :) I hope I can get to know Hilary better, she seems like such an outstanding girl!

Blake Horne:
I don't know Blake very well, but she lives with Rachel and Mareesa and every time I've talked to her she seems like such a sweet girl! Plus, she's known for providing ice cream at some of our social events... so that automatically gives her brownie points (or should I say ice cream points instead?) in my book. She is very mature for her age, and really knows how to have a good time. She's always such a gracious hostess when the group is over at the apartment. Blake is preparing to serve a mission, and I have so much admiration for her faith in doing so! I look up to missionaries so much, and I am lucky to have so many friends who are missionaries! She is going to be a wonderful Sister wherever she serves. It was so nice meeting you this summer Blake, and I hope we can continue to get to know each other better! :)

Jonathan Jardine:
Where do I even start with Jonathan? The first time we met, we got into an argument. To be honest, I didn't like Jonathan very much at first. But then he grew on me... even his sarcasm and his continuous teasing. I'm really glad that Jonathan could get past our age differences (only 6 years, people) and that we could become really good friends. Jonathan has become such an amazing friend to me. Even though we have our moments of arguing, I am so grateful to know him. He is such a great listener and has been there to give me some really awesome advice. I feel like Jonathan really understands how my brain and heart are thinking/feeling, better than a lot of people understand it. He gets the way I think. Jonathan is a deep person, and I really admire that in a friend because I'm a deep person too. He's also very loyal to and protective of his friends, and I know he would do just about anything to help me. Thank you for everything, Jonathan. I'll miss ya.

Aimee Jones: 
Such a small girl, such a huge awesome personality! Like a fun-size candy bar ;) I have loved getting to know Aimee this summer. I don't think I've ever seen her extremely unhappy. She is always such a good sport. She's willing to participate in anything the group does. She always just goes with the flow. She is such a bright happy person, and it makes her incredibly fun to be around! I hope that we can keep in touch while I'm away because I want to get to know her even better! She has a contagious smile, and everyone always loves being around her. Thanks for sharing your bright personality girl!

Emily Liscomb:
Another small girl, big spirit! Emily and I don't know each other very well yet, but I already can tell she is a very wonderful friend and person. She's always ready to have a good time and laugh with the group. I won't forget when we sang Disney songs together at Kyle's house. Anyone who still wants to sing Disney songs with me is definitely a friend! I was bummed that I didn't get to see her last night before I left, but I'm glad we met and that we can continue to be friends. Thanks, Em!

Todd McNeill:
Todd was one of the very first people to welcome me into The Group, and for that I am extremely grateful. He's one of the most genuine people I know. He's honest with me. He will tell me when I'm acting dumb or when I'm being close-minded. I really appreciate him for those reminders. Todd is also very supportive. He was one of my only friends who came to see me in The Miss Riverton Scholarship Pageant, and he didn't even know me very well at the time. He visited me on my birthday, came on walks with me, visited me at work, and had my back at the drop of a hat. Throughout the summer I saw him less and less, but I still consider him one of my good friends and appreciate everything he's done for me. Thanks Todd! :)

Dallin Nay:
Even though I never spent a ton of one-on-one time with Dallin, I've really come to admire him. He's one of those people who is soft spoken, but if you take the time to listen... he says some really funny things! Dallin makes me laugh. He's also awesome with film studies! We watched these movies that he made over the summer, and it was so cool to see his talent! He has such a genuine personality and I'm thankful to know him and can't wait to continue to get to know him better.

Dustin Nay:
Dustin is another person who I never spent a TON of one-on-one time with, but the last week of summer I got to talk to him for quite some time while we were all at the park and it was reaffirmed to me how awesome he is. During ward temple night, Dustin was able to baptize and confirm me and in that moment I was filled with an immense gratitude to have friends who are worthy priesthood and temple-recommend holders. I am so blessed to know that I can call up my friends and ask for a blessing or ask for help when I need it. Dustin is very smart and enjoyable to spend time with, and I'm so happy to call him my friend!

Chris Neff:
Oh, the Neff brothers. :) Two of the most awesome people I know. Chris is so laid back and easy to hang out with, he just rolls with the punches. I remember the first time I rode in his car... and every song that played on his ipod was on my ipod too! I have a somewhat scattered/unique taste in music, and I was happy to find that our tastes in music were so similar! :) Chris and his brother Kevin made a movie called "Scare Bears" (two movies actually. A third one on the way) and they are such a hoot! I can never look at a Care Bear again without being afraid. I'm thankful to know Chris and to have spent time with him this summer. Thanks for all of the edited musicals, by the way!

Kevin Neff:
I actually met Kevin a year ago when we were in The Pirates of Penzance at Hale Centre Theatre together. I'm actually surprised we didn't know each other better back then... considering he carried me and tossed me across the stage quite a few times during the run of the musical. Kevin is a super awesome friend! We became more acquainted during the end of the summer... and I don't know why it took me a year to become better friends with this kid! Kevin and I have so much in common! We both love theatre and have an obsession with the TV Show, So You Think You Can Dance. Not to mention... Kevin is freaking hilarious. He is so witty and funny! Oh my goodness :) Kevin and I have plans to become better friends already, and I can't wait! He's super awesome. (Thanks for the edited musicals, too!) 

Mareesa Roberts:
Older sister to Rachel Roberts... Mareesa is such an amazing friend. She is so gentle and caring. She always has comforting things to say. I love that about Mareesa. Sometimes I don't want advice or insight... I just want comfort, and she has always been there to give that in the few times I have talked to her. She is such a sweetheart and I recently found out we both love to go out dancing, so hopefully we can do that together sometime. When I left town last night, she had nothing but positive things to say and I really appreciated her positivity. Thanks for being my friend Mareesa. You are wonderful :)

Rachel Roberts:
I would have to pin her in the same group with Sam and Emily for the most awesome laugh. :) Rachel is such a cute girl and we both have a love for the movie Tangled! It made my day when she gave me her Tangled poster, and now it's hanging in my bedroom and makes me smile every time I see it :) Rachel is getting ready to serve a mission and I look up to her SO MUCH for it. I think it's amazing that these righteous daughters of God are selfless enough to serve people for 18 months and to spread the gospel. I'm going to miss her when she leaves; but I know her laugh, her personality, and her testimony will touch the lives of many people.

 Emily Sorenson:
Head of the Home Evening Committee... I distinctly recall seeing Emily for the first time during Home Evening and thinking to myself, "This Emily girl would be a really fun person to meet!" little did I know I would get the chance not only to serve on the Home Evening Committee with her, but also to become her friend! Emily has such an infectious laugh, and is so sweet to everyone in The Group. She is so dang pretty, too. I truly admire her leadership skills working with her in the committee... and I admire her friendship too. I have really appreciated the times I've been able to talk to her one-on-one. She always listens and has some great things to say. Love you girl! Can't wait to keep in touch and see your concerts in Ogden! You better let me know how life is going, remember to keep in touch!

Nicole Walker:
I owe a LOT of credit to the Walkers. A lot. And it's weird, because It actually took me over half the summer before I really got to know them. Let's start with Nicole. I love this girl. We were friends back in middle school, and now we've been reunited through the singles ward. I think part of the reason we were able to become friends so quickly this summer is because we were close in middle school. I can't help but think the reason our paths crossed back at Oquirrh Hills was so we could bond 6-7 years later and become even better friends. Nicole is such an amazing friend. She knows how to make me laugh, she's a great listener, and we love to talk. We can just go to my house and do nothing but talk and be completely satisfied. I love friends who are like that. She is such a genuine and supportive friend. She may not know it, but she really helped me out a ton this summer. The fun times I had with Nicole Walker this summer are unforgettable. Watching Winnie The Pooh, vending, meeting Billy Dean, shopping, going on a triple date with her younger sister and older brother, watching movies, talking on the phone late into the night... all of these things (and more) are big reasons why this summer was so memorable for me. I won't forget our second to last week in sacrament meeting when it hit us that we were leaving Riverton for a year and we just started crying in the pew. haha. :) Nicole is thinking about coming to WSU next year... and I would be ecstatic if she did. I would love to meet her and her best friend Dale. I think we would have an amazing time. Even if she doesn't come to Weber, I know that whenever our paths cross and I get to see her, we will be able to catch up and talk like we were never separated! I know she's only a phone call away if I need it, and I am thankful for that. Nicole, you are one of my very best friends... thank you for everything you've done for me over the summer. You are so trustworthy, funny, beautiful, caring, and genuine. I am going to miss you so much. I don't know who I am going to talk boys with, make inside jokes with, or go shopping with.  I love you! Please keep in touch, remember our once-a-month phone date!

Sterling Walker:
Even though I didn't really get to know him until mid-July, I remember seeing/meeting him for the first time. My friend and I went to the South Jordan Rec Center for a pool party. When we got there, hardly anyone was swimming! My friend and I got into the pool and saw ONE other group of people having fun in the water. I remember watching The Group, before I even knew about The Group, and seeing them have a blast at the activity. At that time I had no idea those people would become my closest friends. Nicole and Sterling's faces are the only ones I even distinctly remember seeing that night. I officially met Sterling when we went swing dancing with his cousin James at the beginning of the summer. I knew right then that Sterling was someone I wanted to be friends with. I remember telling my mom, "Nicole's older brother Sterling seems so nice!" Later in the summer we got to know each other better and spent a lot of time hanging out with the group together. We also had many fun rides in his truck 'Jorge'. Riding in the truck with the windows rolled down at midnight is one of my favorite memories of the summer. Hands down. Sterling is an incredible friend. He's the coolest narrator when we play Werewolf, and he sports cut-off pj's and cowboy boots better than anyone else I know! If you want to know what The Group is doing, he's the one to contact. I love how he always tells people to text him when they get home safely. That's just how caring he is towards his friends. :) Sterling is hard-working, spiritual, protective, funny, caring, and always wants everyone to be happy. Sterling is very important to me, and our friendship is very important to me. The time we spent together holds a lot of value to me. I was inexpressibly fortunate to have gotten to know him this summer. Sterling, it may have taken me some time to realize it... but you are truly one of my best friends, and I'd like to thank you for everything you've taught me and the friendship you've given me. I sure will miss you, Ster. Please keep in touch, always.

All of these people (among many others) have taught me so much about a ward family, true friendship, loyalty, love, charity, and being true to yourself and standing up for what you believe in. In just one short summer they welcomed me in with open arms and treated me like one of The Group. They didn't even hesitate to welcome me in as their friend. I don't know how I got so lucky. They are more than I deserve. It's strange to me to think that just four months ago I didn't know any of these people. Now I don't know what I would do without their friendship. It all came and went so quickly, but I will never forget this summer or the friends I have made. It was really hard to go last night, and it was weird sitting in a different chapel without their smiling faces. My heart was filled with gratitude when I got a phone call and a handful of text messages asking if I made it to Ogden safely. The Group's testimonies, quirks, stories, personalities, and examples have influenced my life. I love each one of you. I love the ones that I didn't have time to mention. I will miss you dearly, and I hope that despite being in different cities and wards, we can all keep in touch and remain friends for a long, long time. It's just like Jonathan said,

"You're going to have to try harder than that if you're planning on leaving The Group"
"Once a part of The Group, always a part of The Group"
"The Group is going to miss you."

Well I'm going to miss you guys too.
And I am so glad to be able to say that I am a part of The Group.

My Adventure Streak

Big extreme sports and scary adventures are not my forté. 
Actually, normal sports aren't even my forté.

I suck at sports. Any sport. Throw a ball at me and I will either send myself or someone else to the emergency room. And that's only saying I actually catch it. I am not a dare devil. Extreme sports and adventures are activities that I normally stay far far away from. Call me a wimp... but I would rather avoid activities where I have a high risk of injuring myself. 

Don't get me wrong... I love being outside and hiking, four-wheeling, or camping. I love boating... but I am not good at water skiing or anything. I love being active and would much rather be outside than sit on the couch and watch TV

... I'm just sort of a clutz sometimes.

So when my little sister Brooklyn decided to go indoor skydiving for her 12th birthday I was hesitant. But I wouldn't want to miss out on such a fun opportunity! And it wasn't the real thing... If something were to go wrong I didn't have very far to fall, unlike actual skydiving. After seeing a grandma and a four-year-old fly, I figured I should probably give it a shot.

So I went.
And it was so much fun! I actually didn't do half-bad. The instructor let me go completely because I had good control of my body against the air in the wind tunnel. Brooklyn took some friends with us, and the family and her friends had such a great time! The best part is... I got discount tickets to go again sometime. ifly is in Ogden. Can you say date night? I think so! ;)
Pretty sporty. Pretty adventurous. Okay, maybe not for anyone else. But at least in my book. I mean ifly was the extent of my daring adventures.

Or so I thought until my Dad called from work one day asking me if I wanted to go paragliding. Mom was surprised when I said yes. Sheesh, I was surprised when I said yes! I remember questioning myself after hanging up the phone, giving my dad the affirmative.

So just a week ago I went paragliding at the point of the mountain! At about 7 in the morning I went on a tandem ride off of the mountain and my brother and dad took a lesson down on the bunny hill. (I don't trust myself to steer one of those things)
It was SUCH a blast! I pretty much ran off the side of a mountain until we were floating in the air. The ride was amazing, and there were some blue skies and gorgeous views!


Luckily Mom captured pictures from both of the events. Brooklyn chose a pretty awesome birthday activity... and what better way to end the summer than to go paragliding?? It was so much fun. Looks like I have the potential to be pretty daring and adventurous after all ;)

Friday, August 19, 2011

Weird.

I'm pretty sure this is the first time all summer that I've decided to go to bed before midnight. After a long day of moving into my new home, sleep sounds wonderful. Mom and I spent all day in Ogden getting me settled into my new place. The house is adorable... and it will be the perfect home away from home. Pictures will be up shortly.

Posts coming soon to a blog near you-
* My paragliding adventures
* Indoor skydiving
* O-Town, Chapter Two
* The Group

It's the last weekend of the Summer, folks. School starts Monday. The days are slowly getting shorter. I'm finished up at the Riverton YSA 1st. I quit at the Port of Subs. For the first day in about 3 weeks I didn't see The Group. My room is empty. I'm buckling down for another semester at Weber.

It all just feels kinda weird.

And speaking of school... I better start getting used to the idea of sleep again. So goodnight family, friends, fellow blog nerds, and anonymous readers. There's a lot to be said. But for tonight... Much love :)

Summer 2011 Is:

* Werewolf
* Snow cones with old friends
* Riding in the truck with the windows down
* Funfetti cake
* Visiting the Jordan River Temple every week.
* Late night swimming
* "Old School" by Sam Riddle
* Learning to play billiards
* Long talks
* Neapolitan shakes from In N' Out
* Blogging on the front porch
* Werewolf
* Work at Port of Subs
* Paragliding
* Frogurt
* Driving through yellow stoplights
* Skype dates
* Watching How to Train Your Dragon for the first time
* Sending the "I'm home safe" texts
* Midnight curfews
* "Break My Stride" by Matthew Wilder
* Hatch's Chocolates
* Mastering the pageant wave (elbow elbow, wrist wrist)
* Visiting the UP house
* Pictures
* Eating ice cream out of the bucket
* Indoor skydiving
* Playing "Pooh Sticks"
* More Werewolf
* Admiring the views from Oquirrh Mtn Temple
* Staying up until 2 am.
* Rock climbing
* Movie in the backyard
* Evening walks around the block
* Dancing
* Vending
* Meeting Billy Dean
* Watching Emporer's New Groove for the first time
* Aviators
* Hair drama
* New best friends

... and much more. It's been wonderful. 
Probably one of the best. If only summertime could last a little while longer.

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Uh oh.

Facebook just informed me that Weber State University has a new addition in the Union Building. This lovely little piece of heaven that has been built within walking distance of the Browning Center is called...


I think I may have just peed my pants a little bit. Okay not really, there are better things in life than jamba. (I'm going to be nine miles wide, not to mention broke, if they build a Port of Subs in the Union) But still. I'm going to have to keep my watering mouth, grumbly tummy, and empty wallet far far FAR away from this place.

mmm. I'm craving one right now.

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

♫ Gonna Get Over You ♫


My friend Stephanie showed me this song the other day.
I really like it
Sara Bareilles' music :) pretty good stuff.

Monday, August 15, 2011

When it rains, it pours.

And boy was there a downpour tonight.
Rain, lightning, thunder... the whole package.
The best part is I danced in it. With my friends. At midnight.
I got soaked and it was freezing but I didn't even care.

But despite the actual rain,
... the statement does hold some truth. Ironic. :)

Sunday, August 14, 2011

a small reminder.

Let me preface this post with a couple of thoughts. I posted this exact letter almost a year ago, back in October 2010. I was toying with the idea of re-posting this letter I wrote... and for a while I didn't want to. But I decided it would be a good thing to re-state, if not for others... at least for myself. I don't know why, but reading this post gives me comfort. It's a reminder that there IS someone out there for me who will love me more than anything in this world. I cannot wait to meet him.

I had a midnight chat with my best friend just now. It was so good to talk to her. (And I admit, we even had a good cry.) I needed that. Goodness I love that girl! I still wonder how I was blessed with such a phenomenal friend. Us girls, we have to stick together! So anyway, even though this is a repeat post, this time it goes out to my best friend (love you!), and for many other girls out there who are on the lookout for love. This is our reminder that there IS a Mr. Right, a Prince Charming, a Happily-ever-after. And one day, we will find it. :)

Dear Mr. Right,
 
I've been thinking of you and me and our future together. So while I'm thinking of you, whoever you are; I want you to know that I'm kind of picky... and I'll be asking for a lot. But I know that you'll be my everything when I fall in love with you and I know you'll be able to fill all of the requirements, because you'll be the right man for my heart.

I want you to know that I will have probably practiced writing my name followed by your surname over a thousand times when I've fallen in love with you. I'll probably have handfuls of pictures of you. I'll completely adore you and show you off to all of my friends. I want you to become my best friend. I want you to need me like I need you. I want us to respect each other. I want you to tell me and show me that you love me.


I want a well-thought out proposal. This is forever that we're planning for, so you can put a little effort into asking me. ;) I don't care about money, or being in front of many people... but I want that moment to be special. I want the most beautiful wedding... only in the temple. Please take me there someday. I want a lovely reception with all the corny traditions. Like a bouquet toss. And "something borrowed, something blue, something old, something new". And like cutting the cake. And choosing a flower girl. And a daddy-daughter dance.
You'll have to dance with me too, so start practicing. I want pictures, lots of pictures. And I want our wedding day to be the happiest and most wonderful day I've ever lived.

I want to visit the temple with you many times after our wedding. I want the preisthood to be a constant in my life. In fact, I would hope you're a returned missionary. Because I adore those who are so selfless that they would serve a mission. I want you to honor your priesthood and callings in life, so that I can have the priesthood in my home. I want us to have a house,
and a home. I want to kneel at our bed in prayer with you by my side. I want babies. I want you to bless them in church. I want to make their blessing gowns from my wedding dress and I want to see you holding our babies every day. I want to bring our little children to church and feed them cheerios to keep them quiet. I want to take our kids to walk the gardens of the temple when they're little. I want them to know that I know the church is true.

I want to see you roll down grassy hills with our children in the summer, or jump on the trampoline with them, or go sledding with them in the wintertime. I want you to give our children silly nicknames. I want our family to go traveling together. I want a journal for our family. I want to take bubble bath pictures of our babies, and put them in adorable scrapbooks. I want us all to go on bike rides together. I want our family to sing around campfires, laugh until our tummies hurt, and read stories before bedtime. I want our children to look up to us, exactly how I look up to my parents. I want to watch them grow up and experience the world for themselves. I want our family to learn together. I want to be with my family for eternity.


I want you to be my best friend. I want to fall in love with you every day. I want every kiss to be like the first and last kiss. I want us to write handwritten letters to each other, signed with 'love' or 'yours truly' at the bottom. I want you to kiss me on the forehead and I want you to hold me in your arms. I want to wear your button up shirts and smell your cologne. I want us to tell each other
everything. I want us to be able to talk for hours and hours, and still be comfortable whenever silence settles in. I want to treasure those golden silent moments with you. I want you to support me in all that I do. I want you to love me with my imperfections and quirks. Please don't try to change me. I will love you even with your faults, I promise. I want you to braid my hair. I want you to love me even when I'm not dolled up. I want to bring you lunch while you're at work. I want to sit on the front porch with you and watch the sun set. I want to sleep under the stars, swim naked in lakes, and dance in the rain. I want to make you soup when you're sick. I want us to grow a garden. I want to smile every day. I want you to teach me new things. I want to grow old with you. I want you to have faith in me. I want happily ever after... forever.

I know it's a lot to ask for, but I know you're out there somewhere. Whether I've met you already or not, I can't wait to
really meet you... to happen upon that moment in my life when I'll know you are the one I've been waiting for. I want to truly be deserving of you. I want to be the best wife and mother I can be. I feel so small to be thinking about getting married, but I know the day is coming closer and closer every morning when I wake up. So I'm going to work harder and harder so that I'm more satisfied with my life every night when I fall asleep. I'm working hard, learning, and loving life so that when I find you I will be ready. Please look for me; I'll be very patient... there's no rush. ;) but still, I will dream for the day when I have you. My fairytale, my happily ever after, my one and only... and I want you to know that I love you, and I'll love you forever.

Yours truly,

Bailee.

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

{almost} everything a girl needs.

Just a couple of things I couldn't do without right now...

just ate chocolate
wearing matching pajamas
watching my favorite movie
barefoot
sitting in a clean room
holding my teddy
wrapped in my pink blanket
no makeup

... this is called 'me' time.

Tonight I ate a much-needed slice of German Chocolate Cake. 
Thank goodness Mom was thoughtful enough to share with me.


 And now I'm watching my all-time favorite movie.
I don't even know why it's my favorite, it's actually kind of sad.
Mom cries every time. But I love it. I love love. Ah :) such a good flick.

Also, I kind of love this quote right now.
Forget it, I just love quotes. But this one especially, right now anyway.

"Some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, and taking the moment and making the best of it without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity."

Anyway, now it's time to enjoy my movie until I fall asleep. 
Much love. Over and out.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

On repeat all day.



movie of life.

I found this online once upon a time, from a friend's blog. I really love the analogy, and wanted to share.
And so I'm sharing. Enjoy :)

in our lives, we are the star of the show. let's face it. we see the world through the lens of ourselves. we only have our perspective.

there are other important people, however. i call them costars. there are usually a small handful of costars at any given time. these are the people around whom our thoughts and actions revolve.

then there are the secondary characters. this group consists of most of the people we know. they play a pretty prevalent role in our lives, but aren't really the central consideration.

the last group before "extras" is the comic relief. these people have no real meaning to us, but they pop in every so often and do ridiculous things. like, you know, the fruit vendor below your apartment. or something like that. they might even have a speaking part.

and the rest of the world serves as extras. background characters.

they do rotate over the years, which is sometimes strange and sad but also necessary in the progression of the movie. because movies without conflict are hecka boring.

an interesting occurrence in life is when two people cast each other differently. like you suddenly realize that you are someone's costar, when they were at best a secondary character to you. this is conflict.

and the crazy, insane thing is the realization that we ALL have these movies. extras are not just extras. they are each the star of their movie, with friends and family and drama and humor and everything else that exists in your spectrum of existence.

and all of our costars (except family) started out as extras. just people. we meet people every day, and we usually have no idea which ones will become a part of our life movie, as most just pass through, never to be seen again. when watching movies and television, it's a fun game to guess which of the extras will become relevant to the plot. on a particular episode of the x-files, mulder and scully are standing at a desk talking to someone, and in the background a woman is vigorously shaking her pen, trying to get the ink to come out. this is not typical extra behavior. i instantly knew she was going to play a part in the story. she then turned to scully and asked to borrow a pen, upon which, if i remember correctly, she planted some sort of listening device. correct me if i'm wrong.

in life, however, these people are harder to spot. there really is no "typical extra behavior," as these people are real and therefore are allowed to shake their pens vigorously without raising suspicion. are there ways to tell? is this just another meaningless meeting, or will this be the story of how you met your spouse? will this be the person who later moves into your apartment and mooches off you for a month? will this be the friend whose cat you accidentally (or otherwise) poison?

this movie is the most unpredictable movie of all.

A Day with Gus and Lassy

Last Thursday I spent the entire day with two of my favorite people. Sterling and Nicole Walker are such a hoot. If you're in need of a good laugh or want to have a fun day, these are the people to be around.

I met Nicole back in middle school. We had the same homeroom, and we actually were really close friends. When we started high school, life carried us away. Then this summer I met Sterling while attending the Singles Ward. I soon found out that Sterling was Nicole's older brother. (Small world, right?) 

I consider myself extremely lucky. Not only did I meet a really awesome guy, but I was reunited with one of my old friends too! It was definitely a double-win. And I am so grateful that they put up with me so often. :)

So on Thursday the Walkers invited me to go vending with them. Now what is Vending?

Their family owns all of the gum ball machines in every Arctic Circle in Utah, or something to that effect. Every month they dedicate a day to visiting each of these Arctic Circles to upkeep the machines that they own. Hence the term, "Vending".

Nicole and Sterling consider Vending to be a very mundane chore. I suppose Vending month after month could become redundant, but since I had never been Vending before I jumped at the chance to go; and not only to eat gumballs and count quarters... but to spend the day with these two amazing people! They kept looking at me incredulously when I expressed my enthusiasm to join them on this epic adventure!

We started on the road shortly after ten in the morning and visited Arctic Circles clear in Roy all the way down to Saratoga Springs. I had a blast spending quality car time with Nicole and Sterling

After my first vending experience I was scheduled to serve food at a private Billy Dean concert for my Stake President, Pres. Plumb. I asked Pres. Plumb if I could bring Sterling and Nicole with me. I was so happy when he said yes! So after our stop in Saratoga Springs we drove back home and got ready for the concert.

We all drove to the concert together. Sterling got to chauffeur the guests in golf carts while Nicole and I helped with food/stood there and looked pretty. The food was delicious, and Billy Dean was awesome.

On the way home we had a fun ride until Sterling's truck, Jorge, broke down. We pulled into the nearest gas station (luckily we made it off the freeway) and Mom came to pick Nicole and I up while Sterling's grandpa towed Jorge back home.

After the minor setback with the truck, the three of us ended the day with a good movie. It was such an outstanding day, even if Nicole and Ster think that Vending is a chore. We had a lot of laughs, and a lot of inside jokes came from our adventures.

Some of the highlights of the day:

*Seeing the Red Bull truck on the freeway.

*Eating Cafe Rio for lunch in Draper

*"You didn't make it any easier... but I'm not complaining"

*Seeing double 77 and then triple 777 on license plates

*Visiting the UP House in Herriman and meeting Carl

*Eating chocolate toppers at the Arctic Circle in Saratoga Springs

*Kissing the roof as we drove under yellow lights

*"Sterling... what happened to your bottom?"

*Dancing like crazy in Jorge and watching people stare at us.

*Becoming like, oh my gosh, best friends with Billy Dean! ;)

*Being the Stake President's personal recommendation

*Watching Nicole row a pretend paddle out of Jorge's window like he was a canoe

*Watching creeper guys stare at Nicole and I

*Driving on the freeway with the windows rolled down

*Meeting the Walker's grandparents

*Falling asleep on the couch while watching Soul Surfer :)

It was an outstanding day. Probably one of my favorite days of the entire summer. We've gotten to spend a lot of time together lately. Hopefully they don't get tired of me! ;) I am so blessed to know both Sterling and Nicole, and I know that I want to keep in touch with both of these incredible people. 

Thank you Sterling and Nicole for the great day and some amazing memories. :) Love ya both!

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

late-night nothings.

I have a lot on my mind right now. For some reason I always have more on my mind late at night. Small problems become big problems, and small thoughts become over-analyzed situations that may or may not be driving me crazy. So basically I try to avoid blogging in these wee hours. (for the courtesy of my poor unfortunate readers, if nothing else)

But sometimes it's good for me to blog at night and get these thoughts out of my head and straightened out on paper (or computer screen, if you will.) Vague as this post may seem to others... I'm hoping that talking about some of the things on my mind tonight will ease my mind and help me think more straight.

Be prepared for this post, lovely reader. You may be in for quite the ride.
(You have been warned)

Where do I even start? This summer has been one of the best... in ways that I wasn't even planning on. I was banking on this summer being the epitome of amazingness - and it definitely has been - but not in any of the ways I was expecting.

This is the first summer in a long list of summers where I wasn't cast in a summer show. At first I was very upset about not being a part of a production, but I learned a few very important things that I wouldn't have learned had I been cast in a show this season.

Despite the normal every-day challenges of a young adult trying to find her way into a career choice, a dating life, and an adult life... I'm probably the happiest I've been in quite a while. Life hasn't been perfect, but I truly have been very happy this summer. I've learned that (although I still remain passionate for performing) I don't need to be in a show to be genuinely happy. Being in plays and musicals make me ecstatic and enthusiastic about life... but there are other ways to gain that same happiness without being on stage. I've always thought myself to be a pretty well-rounded person, but this summer I think I've definitely become even more well-rounded... and all because I wasn't cast in a show.

This realization that I can be happy without being in a show has made me further question my decision to switch majors. I LOVE LOVE LOVE being a musical theatre major. Ah, I get so excited when I think about it. But I also love children and I love teaching others to be passionate about what I'm passionate about. I love sharing my love of theatre with other people. 

And so lately I've been debating switching to a Theatre Ed major. One of the reasons I didn't want to switch majors was because I didn't know how I would handle the whole not performing all the time thing. Now- I know that I would still get opportunities to perform in shows even if I were a Theatre Ed. major, but I wouldn't be able to take as many of the performance-based classes or the classes that strengthen your performance skills. And I really want to enhance those skills. Well, not being in a show this summer has helped me realize that I can be sufficiently happy in life without performing All. The. Time.

The "Musical Theatre Major v. Theatre Ed. Major" is a big topic in my brain these days. It almost deserves its own entire post. So you will be hearing more about it. But that's for another time.

Also, I can't help but be grateful for the friends I have made this summer. If I was in a show this summer, I know I wouldn't have created the relationships that have become so important to me as of late, because instead of creating new friendships with people from my hometown I would have been rehearsing every night of the week. Granted, I'm sure I would have made friends with the people I was performing with had I been in a show... but I know there is a reason I became close with this specific group of people this summer, and I am so grateful that I found them and that they welcomed me ever so graciously into their circle of friends.

Which brings me to another major topic of my summer. The Singles Ward. Most of the friends I have made this summer are from my ward, or from the neighboring Herriman ward. But honestly I love my entire ward. I have loved every ward I've been a part of in the past, but I have never been part of a ward where I have felt more welcomed, needed, accepted, and loved. I feel like I fit right in. I love meeting new people every week. I have been so extremely blessed to hold two callings this summer and to be able to go to activities and church meetings every week. This Singles Ward has touched my life, and I will always remember the wonderful things I learned from them this summer.

And so now here comes my concern and worry. I'm often afraid that my singles ward in Ogden this coming year won't be nearly as amazing as the ward I'm in now. I know, I know... it's all about perspective and having an optimistic attitude... but it's just extremely hard to leave something so blissfully sweet behind me. 
I'm having a harder time thinking about moving out this year than I did last year. And it's not because I'm homesick or I miss my family. I love my home and my family more than anything in this world... but I know that even after I go to Ogden they'll be here waiting for me whenever I need to come back home. My family is the one constant in my life. No matter how else the world turns, they will be there for me.

It's more the seemingly temporary things in my life that I'm afraid to leave behind. I don't want to lose touch with good friends. I don't want relationships to falter because of my leaving for school. I don't want to leave my amazing ward and the job I've become so comfortable with. I don't want to return to a school where my best friends are all gone on missions, graduated, or transferring schools.

I'm excited to start fresh and live on my own and study what I love. But man, I'm gonna miss this summer.

There are specific relationships in particular that I feel I haven't had enough time to develop as much as I want to. Now when things are just getting started, I have to move out and hope that the beginnings of the ties will be strong enough to hold despite the craziness called life that carries us away far too often. I also have to brace myself that there's a good chance these ties won't hold... and I have to be ready to move on when those ties break.

Part of me feels like I'm repeating last year, in a way. And I'm trying desperately to avoid unnecessary repeats. But I also don't want to miss out on something potentially outstanding because I'm afraid of repeating history or making a mistake. Life's chalk full of mistakes anyway... right? :) Might as well embrace em'.

I'm also frustrated at people who feel they need to be updated about my life when in reality they have no right to be sticking their nose in my business. I wish I could just work things out on my own without people contributing to the situation. Feelings are confusing enough without people throwing odd perspectives and tidbits of advice at you. I know people are just trying to help and I wonder if they realize they're just making things so much more complicated than they need to be? 

I do appreciate the few people who I can tell anything to and receive advice from. I am so grateful for those few trusted listening ears. I hate the fact that sometimes these people seem so far away. I miss my best friends. Thank goodness for Mom and Heavenly Father, or else I don't know who I would talk to.

Anyway... time is ticking and I can't help but silently wish that summer would slow down just a little. Part of me isn't ready to go back to school quite just yet. In the meantime I'm just enjoying every day and continually pondering about school decisions, boys, goals for the fall, and the singles ward and the many other things that cloud my head at night and seem completely trivial in the morning.

So there you have it. Some of the random ramblings of Bailee's Brain... 2:42 in the morning. Try and make sense of it if you wish. Or just read and move on. If you've gotten this far I congratulate you, faithful little friend :) To be continued, I'm sure. Much love and goodnight.